“You guys are worthless.”
Even now, six years later, I can still feel the venomous sting of those words mumbled by the gentleman in 3C as he de-planed in Indianapolis. I was about six months into my new career as a flight attendant, and was just beginning to see the lackluster side of crew life. Since I was new, I was still getting used to traveling all the time and was not sleeping well. Still, despite my exhaustion from learning a new job, I was determined to remain professional and poised in front of my passengers.
“Bye now. Thanks for joining us!” I cheerfully called back to 3C, pretending I did not hear his jabbing comment. Though my face did not show it, on the inside, I was crushed.
I was the first-class flight attendant and had just worked a flight from Chicago O’Hare to Indianapolis International. It was a quick 30-minute flight; however, the Indianapolis area was experiencing thunderstorms, so the captain had instructed the flight attendants to cancel the in-flight beverage service due to expected turbulence. I had assumed our passengers would understand given how bumpy the flight was – and they did – except for 3C.
Outraged that he did not receive his complimentary cocktail, 3C even continued to complain to the gate agent after he made his way to the top of the jet bridge.
“Those flight attendants are worthless!” I heard him scream as I followed my crew out of the gate area to our layover.
‘Maybe 3C is right,’ I thought to myself, feeling defeated and emotionally drained. ‘Maybe I am worthless.’
From there, we left the airport and proceeded to our hotel, and, although my heart went out to the victimized gate agent, I never discovered the outcome of this particular situation. As the next few years went by, I became accustomed to disgruntled and angry passengers and learned how to deescalate most situations before they got out of control. Often, I have found that simply trying to understand passengers’ perspectives when they are angry helps enormously. As Dale Carnegie put it in his book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, “Success in dealing with people depends on a sympathetic grasp of the other person’s viewpoint.”
Turbulent Months in the Skies
Click-clack.
Click-clack.
My heels hit the abandoned airport floor, the sound echoing ominously. I looked down at my wristwatch.
5:50 a.m.
My report time was in 10 minutes, and I scanned the terminal desperately for any open coffee stand.
Sorry, temporarily closed due to COVID-19, I read on a sign in front of each Starbucks.
Ugh. I sleeplessly made my way to my gate.
I stepped onto the aircraft for my flight to San Jose. My shoulders and forearms quivered as I hoisted my hefty luggage into the overhead bin. Because I notoriously like to over prepare (just ask my husband), I had packed an extra week’s worth of clothing, food, and toiletries in case I became exposed to the coronavirus during my trip and had to hunker down in a hotel somewhere.
“Better safe than sorry,” I said to a crewmember, slightly embarrassed.
It was late March of 2020, and at that point, I had been flying for nearly five years. The world was closing its door in the face of a pandemic, and my career as I knew it had just been turned on its head. Airports were noiseless except for eerie coronavirus announcements on the loudspeaker.
“To help stop the spread of the coronavirus,” a woman’s voice would instruct in some variation, “keep a distance of six feet from others and wash your hands with soap and water for at least 20 seconds.
I felt like I had been transported into a post-apocalyptic movie like Doomsday, with talk of a deadly virus suddenly becoming the new normal. This isn’t happening, I told myself over and over during those first few weeks. It was happening, though — and it was only getting worse.
The few flights that were still operating carried only a handful of passengers — mainly doctors and nurses flying to coronavirus “hotspots,” or travelers flying to say goodbye to dying loved ones. Every flight carried heavy emotions and uncertain futures; my heart broke for my passengers nearly every day.
A couple of my flights even had coronavirus scares. Once, a little boy complained of nausea and a cough mid-flight. As we took the family’s temperatures and contacted our emergency medical team, I silently prayed that they would all be negative. Not only was I in close contact with them, but the entire airplane was in danger if they had COVID.
Please, please, please, I prayed. Please keep us safe. Thankfully, everyone was OK and we arrived safely at our destination.
Soon, most airlines discontinued their inflight food and beverage services, making long flights seem painfully never-ending. Layovers felt long and monotonous, as many restaurants and tourist attractions in major cities closed. By April, the majority of the world’s airplanes were parked in silent sleeping herds at various airports due to low demand.
The Mask Mandates
Then, in May of 2020, all major U.S. airlines established mask mandates for passengers and crew members. This was great news! I felt much safer coming to work knowing everyone on the plane would be wearing a mask.
Unfortunately, with new rules typically come rule breakers — and this was no exception.
“Excuse me; can you please put your mask on?” I would ask a passenger for what seemed like the hundredth time.
Eyes would roll. At times, profanities would spew. Then for a while, they would comply — only to take their mask off again while they napped.
Scenarios like this have played out on hundreds of flights over the months. Eventually, the Federal Aviation Administration began placing hefty fines on passengers who refused to comply with airlines’ mask policies. In February, the FAA fined a female passenger over $30,000 for mask non-compliance plus aggressive behavior.
Additionally, the Biden Administration recently made mask mandates in airports and airplanes federal law — meaning non-compliance could render penalties under federal law.
And Yet The Issues Continue
Despite these efforts, passengers have continued to fight mask policies.
Cases of unruly passenger behavior have skyrocketed across the industry. By May 24, there were 2,500 reports of unruly passengers on flights filed with the FAA since January — with over 1,900 of those involving mask non-compliance. A few days later, a flight attendant lost two of her teeth after being assaulted by an unruly passenger mid-flight. Just two weeks after that, another flight attendant was forced to tackle a passenger after he attempted to breach the flight deck while the plane was in the air.
“Flight attendants are first responders in the sky who are focused on safety,” Transport Workers Union 556 President Lyn Montgomery told CNN. “As people return to the skies, we are asking for everyone’s help in complying with flight attendant requests to help ensure a safe and fun atmosphere for all.”
Thankfully, most of my flight disruptions have been quickly resolved without anyone getting hurt. Still, the recent abusive and threatening behavior towards flight attendants has reached an unprecedented and unacceptable level.
There have been several days on the aircraft lately that have caused past emotions to surface, taking me back to those early days as a flight attendant and the man in 3C.
You guys are worthless.
Those words have replayed in my mind more times this year than I would like to admit. Words are powerful; and when used this way, they hurt immensely.
Sometimes, I feel like passengers see flight attendants as robots who only exist to serve Coca-Cola in plastic cups. I love my job — truly. However, there are still days where I find myself switching to waterproof mascara because of the cruel things passengers sometimes say to me.
We are not robots, and we are most definitely not worthless. We are people with emotions, intelligent thoughts, and a purpose on this earth. We have good days and bad days. We experience heartbreak, grief, loss, and fear — just like you.
The Good Ones Out There
Yes, many passengers mistreat flight attendants. However, the world is still full of good and kind people. I think sometimes, you just have to experience unpleasant people to truly appreciate the pleasant ones. There have been many passengers who have truly made an impact with their unexpected kindness.
One Thanksgiving a few years ago, I worked a flight home from Kona, Hawai’i. It was busy — we were on our feet nearly the entire six-hour flight. We were all exhausted, and we terribly missed our families for the holiday.
Just as we were about to land, a passenger handed us all individually written notes from her and her family. Mine read:
Sweet crew,
We know that you could be home enjoying time off with your loved ones but chose to serve us on Thanksgiving…Thank you for your love, dedication, and hearts to love on us travelers as we make our way back home. I can see how tremendously hard you work and wanted to encourage you all that it truly makes a difference. Thank you so much.
Though I will admit I am a sensitive person by nature, I do not think a single flight attendant read their note without shedding a tear. To this day, my note hangs on my fridge as a warm reminder.
Thank you so much to all of you who thank us for what we do. Thank you for the chocolates, the pre-pandemic hugs, and the words of encouragement. People like you make this job worth it.
Though small acts of kindness may seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things, they truly stay in the hearts of flight attendants forever.
By: Rebekah Harcrow
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