OVER-EXCITED CLAPPING AND A FOREHEAD WIPE for the upcoming debates. We worked hard [and by “we”, I mean our fabulous admin Melissa who doesn’t get enough credit for everything she does] to get 7 of the 8 Democratic candidates for Congressional District 4, as well as 2 of the 2 candidates for County Commissioner Position 1, to come to your screens and tell us all why you should vote for them as opposed to anyone else. It all happens here, Tuesday and Thursday of next week [April 26 & 28] at 6:30 p.m. each day. The more local-er debate will be Tuesday, as well as some pros and cons concerning the Corvallis School Levy. The more federal-er debate happens Thursday. Send in your questions now!
CHEERS AND A ROUND OF APPLAUSE for birthdays. We all get to have one every single ever-lovin’ year no matter how crazy old we get [ask our publisher, he’s getting’ really really old… jussayin’]. Yet out there, in the world, corporations are ready, willing, and sneaky enough to offer you free s**t on your special day just to get you in their doors all the other days of the year [for your “un-birthdays” as Disney so quaintly put it]. So, if today is your day, and everyone else has either forgotten or is planning a surprise party making you feel lonely and unloved until the moment they jump up from behind couches to scream at you, then read this article about places that will make you feel better. And Happy Birthday! [unless you’re our publisher, in which case… Dude, stop aging already!]
FURROWED BROWS over the situation with Nate Monson. Monson was brought into the state government to assist in the handling of harassment issues – basically he was meant to take complaints then lead complainants through the process. Well, Monson quit after two months on the job, claiming he’d been the target of retaliation after he pointed out lapses in accountability. As he left, Monson issued a memo regarding his predecessor’s poor job performance. Our fun group of elected officials bit back by saying Monson lied on his resume and was going to be fired anyway. Despite the oncoming elections, suing is now happening. Metaphorically, Monson’s memo amassed a monsoon of monstrous moments amid the moneymakers at a momentous moment.
MORE FUN WITH LAWMAKERS and harassment! It seems that legislative employees don’t wanna go to mandatory sexual harassment training as presented by the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. No, it’s not because they want to be able to continue their harassing ways [if such ways exist, which we cannot confirm at this time], but rather that the EEOC trainer is, to put it bluntly, a putz. How was said trainer putzlike? They were found to be dismissive and they discouraged people from reporting harassment. [If you were wondering if you’d fallen into a wormhole that took you back to 2020 when people were allegedly being groped by Sen. Kruse, then no, you haven’t, it’s 2022 and this is the Kruse-related fallout.]
CHEERS for ingenuity in John Day. First, they’ve built a greenhouse to defy all other greenhouses in the land… or, rather, a very large greenhouse that will provide fresh veggies for residents all year long using “grey water” so as not to lose regular drinking water. And B, they’re using 3-D printing to make houses [and, no, not doll houses – people houses]. The goal is to get people excited about living in Central Eastern Oregon. [Not gonna lie, us Valleyfolk are thinking that there might be a really big ask.]
And now this…
NERDY CHEERS for books. We love books. Our editor has so many, she’s had to kick her kids down to the basement to house the many shelves needed for her continuously growing collection. It’s because of this love of the literary that we are saying…
BOOS AND HISSES to book bans. According to an article by Oregon Capital Chronicle, in the last nine months, hundreds of books have been banned across dozens of states – meaning PA kids can’t read about our 44th president, TN kids can’t read about the Holocaust, and WI kids can’t read about a gay rights activist. States and the parents in them are limiting their children from reading about same sex couples, about interracial marriage [yes, you read that right, interracial marriage – are we back in the ‘50s?], about Peter Pan [not sure what the controversy is there], and about LGBTQ+ lives and rights.
We at The Corvallis Advocate are outraged about this, and strongly encourage everyone to check out this story.
Correction: Apparently we were so excited to hear the candidates debate, we put the wrong dates in to have it all happen earlier. The debates are April 26 & 28. We’ve fixed it and are currently flogging the reporter as you read this.
Do you have a story for The Advocate? Email editor@corvallisadvocate.com